Excellent toys and gifts for upcoming bachelor party

When I was looking for some fun and naughty party favors for an upcoming bachelor party, I found an amazing website for adult toys that had something for pretty much anyone. I was also impressed by the convenience and discretion of ordering these items online, which are simply not products found in my local retail options. The convenience of finding these hard-to-find items, and the comfort of being able to click here and getting exactly what I wanted was a great relief.

I had been primarily looking for personal vibrators and massage devices, and also wanted to find some anal butt plugs for the groom-to-be. The clearance section of this particular website offered a wide range of items that suited the party perfectly, but that were priced lower than I had expected for such toys. I cannot imagine trying to buy anal beads or butt plugs from a local shop; I am sure that the embarrassment would impede my search. However, the privacy of shopping online and the courteous service that this company provided ensured that I got what I wanted without awkwardness or stress.

I also enjoyed reading the blog that this merchant had available on their site. I was able to read posts from other shoppers regarding merchandise, various options, and experiences that made it easier to narrow down my own order. This was the perfect way to find these sensitive items easily!

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Spicing Up Your Boring Boomer Sex Life

If you’ve not been able to enjoy sex of late or your sex life has turned bland and boring, the following sex tips may help you add spice to it-

Striptease or lap dance for your lover- You don’t need to be a great dancer to be able to be a sexy stripper!  Sensuous tracks or your private performance are in abundance, all you need is to remove your clothes slowly and in a sexy way! A wet white shirt, hot pants, a sexy bra-top and a neck-tie tied loosely around your neck can be sexy accesories.

If you are too shy to strip, do a lap dance for your lover in your sexy nighty clothes.

Sex toys – Sex toys can add excitement to orgasm free relationships!  Visit a  sex toy store to buy online or just go to a shop. You can find bullet vibrators at RelaxationInc.com along with  a large variety of dildos, vibrators, gels, oils, and other sexy items.

Edible lingerie-  Eat the ultimate desert after a romantic dinner. Feel him lick your clothes off will be the ultimate turn on for you and making your edible underclothes disappear will be a delight for all his senses!

Erotic stories – Read erotic literature to each other; it won’t put you to sleep like bed-time stories but will get you into the mood for something much more pleasurable!

Try different positions- There are thousands of known positions and you can make up your own too. Try them now and get your sex life back on track. Buy a manual and learn about new positions. Watch porn or read together to help you get rid of your own inhibitions as well.

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Why is this site so offensive?

I was speaking to an acquaintance of a rather conservative nature the other day and he told me he had taken a look at my site. When I asked him what he thought of it, he said “I was offended by it. Why would you make something that is so offensive?”

I explained that while our world society has many wonderful things that we can sing the praises of, there is also a dark side. Our world has become offensive. Things like the continued genocide in Darfur, the slaughter of civilians in Iraq, the eroding of civil liberties in the United States, the environmental destruction of the entire planet, corporate greed in the face of needless suffering, the profits of the arms industry at the expense of hundreds of thousands of innocent lives, and the lies that are spewed in our face everyday.

“I know it is offensive to see all this information, but I think it is important.” I told him. “There are plenty of sites that focus on only the happy things. It’s important to be aware of the rest too.”

He looked at me kind of funny for a second and then he said “I meant I was offended that you used the F-Word.”

And there is the point, my friends. In this world that is filled with the most offensive acts of hatred, war, greed, and deceipt…isn’t it curious that anyone would be offended by FUKN??? I mean when you say it, it can sound like Fucking. But honestly, what is so offensive about fucking? Sex is beautiful. It can be one of the world’s greatest delights and treasures. It’s fun. Provided that all participants are willing and able, it is fun and healthy. What is so offensive about fucking? Nothing. That’s what.

So let’s cut the crap. The double entendre of this site is obvious and intentional. I am the Chairman of the Fucking Board and you can read the name of this site as Incredible Fucking Us or Fucking U.S. or fucking us, as in George Bush and his Associates are Fucking us. If you are offended by my use of the word fucking, then you can go fuck yourself! If, however, you are enlightened enough to see that the world is full of things much more offensive than a word made up of four letters…then please read on, come back, let us know any information you would like us to disseminate, and spread the word. Incredible Fukn Us is not going anywhere.

Enjoy your day.

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Top Search Terms that Lead to Fukn.us

this is the list from my server…I can’t beleive Rubber Johnny beats me by close to 30%. At least we finish ahead of Chris Anal….

1 31.37% rubber johnny
2 3.92% scary babies
3 1.63% fukn us
4 1.63% chris byrd
5 1.63% george bush fishing
6 1.31% borbor bele
7 1.31% terrence daniel lee
8 0.98% bernest
9 0.98% free printings of 2006 cute baby picture calendars
10 0.98% naked women
11 0.65% 60% of what you say is crap
12 0.65% bellingham
13 0.65% burning man photo gallery
14 0.65% burningman 2005
15 0.65% carolina panthers cheerleaders arrested
16 0.65% celebrityoops
17 0.65% chris anal
18 0.65% chris okotie
19 0.65% free follow sex film video
20 0.65% george bush and his dad

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Fukn Us is Really Fukn You

Hey….We love doing this…I mean, we would do this even if we were the only fukn people to look at the site…but the fact is, I have a hit counter and it shows that there are a fukn lot of fukn people coming here everyday, checking us out, reading our stories, downloading fukn podcasts, listening to fukn music, and looking at the fukn pictures….

SO…WHAT THE FUCK DO WE HAVE TO DO TO GET MORE OF YOU TO MAKE COMMENTS; SEND US COOL LINKS, STORIES, AND PICS; AND GET FUKN INVOLVED????

Okay, I’m through yelling now…seriously, this shit is fun. I love it. It would be more fun though, if you fuckers got involved…

tell us what you hate

send us your art, music, websites, pictures, stories…. (I mean, we are honest reviewers and will tell you if we think it sucks….or if we love it)

make some fucking comments on what we post (you don’t even have to register to do it, try it.)

something….please…or not…either way, we will keep going…we don’t really care about you at all…not even a little….okay…maybe a tiny little bitty bit….

and by the way…tell your friends and coworkers about Incredible Fukn.us

Thanks you fukn fukrs….

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Some Cool Fukn Readers

I am pleased and honored to present the latest submissions from the readers of Fukn.us

You are a creative bunch of Fukrs and I tip my hat to all of you.

Jack Collins has completely wowed myself and Mink Hippie with his photography. Here is what MH has to say about it…I’m really pretty impressed with these photos. Some photos (speaking generally, not about this work) seem to merely document or catalog their subject, while great photos can show you the subject through someone else’s eyes. Diane Arbus could do this – when she photographed conventionally pretty subjects, they often seemed grotesque and,conversely, conventionally ugly subjects became touching or beautiful.Some of Collins’ images have this quality of personal vision.

Collins is developing a gimlet eye for the worthwhile image that
surpasses documentation. His landscapes and cityscapes recall Edward
Hopper (whose reputation suffers from the overexposure of “Nighthawks”
but whose work is heartbreakingly stark and poignant and arresting).
Some of my favorite images on Collins’ site are Under the Boardwalk,
Lucky Seven, Weighting, and Closed. I like his shots of backs – backs
can be very expressive. There’s a great Dorothea Lange photo of a
farmer’s back in a white shirt that I could stare at for ages. (In one
of Collins’ photos, a flier displayed on a dining table features a
Dorothea Lange photo.)

Great stuff. I expect him to be very successful. The website design is
sharp, too.

The Town that Forgot to Breath is the latest from Kenneth J. Harvey . Reviewers have been giving it stellar reviews. Here is a sampling….

      “Comparisons with Stephen King’s commercial power and Annie Proulx’s literary warmth are apt but glib. Harvey is an author whose storytelling prowess can speak for itself.”– Publisher’s Weekly

“An eerie and gripping story, the work of an extravagantly haunted
imagination.”
– J.M. Coetzee, Nobel Prize winning author of Disgrace

“Both a contemporary and an historical novel, The Town that Forgot How
to Breathe is a tour de force! It speaks of the sea: of those who are
upon it, beside it, beneath it. Kenneth J. Harvey, a writer like no
other, is as knowledgeable as he is adventurous. A very exceptional
novel, extraordinary in its power.”
– Alistair MacLeod, author of No Great Mischief

“A novel of dazzling ambition and strange, haunting loveliness.
Grippingly entertaining and bursting with life, it is an absolute
triumph of the storyteller’s art. Many books are hyped as
‘unputdownable’.
This one really is.”
– Joseph O’Connor, author of Star of the Sea

Sulliman Sattori and his band ASD are bringing some great middle eastern vibes to funk and hiphop at Art Revolutionaries. I dig the sound. Might need to be fine tuned, but maybe I need to be fine tuned. In fact, I definitely do.

The base and drum duo Swims is sending me a demo cd, I will hold off on reviewing them until then, but what do you think?

Triston Brewer is an American artist living in Berlin that is into so many different mediums it is hard to keep track..but check out the art

Alisha is an artist here in Hawaii that obviously enjoys living a life of wonder and ease. Check out her photographs and art here.

I’ve just had an inspiration…I’ll post the links and you guys can review it…Me, Mink Hippie, and Bernest can also post our reviews as comments….hmmm…

Erica has put together an online forum for Manhattanites (???) at The Manhattan Project Actually it looks like it is for anyone at all…

Actually, I love Maria Gatti’s cave paintings

Okay…you guys amaze and amuse and humble me (and that ain’t so easy to do….) Keep sending us your links and we’ll keep putting them up and letting you know what we think of em…

 

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A note from the Chairman of the Fukn Bored

A few readers have recently asked me if I screen or select or edit what any of the writers here at Incredible Fukn.us post. The answer is no. All of the bloggers here have total editorial control for their own posts. I have also given that to David with regards to his letters from Iraq. As David pointed out, he and I have some different views about things, but I think it is important to foster expression and discussion. There is no way to do that if I am only letting people post things that I agree with. Me being a fascist about what is posted here isn’t any fun for anyone. That being said, I am in the drivers seat. It is a position of some small power and responsibility. I recognize that me bashing my points doesn’t do anything to make Incredible Fukn.us more interesting, so when I have an issue with something Bernest, The Rev, Mink, or Bambi posts, I engage in conversation with them off the site. I also encourage them to post whatever they want, even if it doesn’t fit with what I believe.

So in general readers, what you read here written by me, is what I believe. David’s letters from Iraq are what he is going through, seeing, and doing. And posts from Mink, Bernest, Bambi, or The Rev reflect their views. Same thing goes for comments.  Keep em coming!

 

Chairman of the Fukn Bored

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